Saturday, January 31, 2009

My Shitty Taste

1) Lovers by Foreign Slippers
2) Make You Feel My Love by Adele
3) I Wish I Was a Fisherman by Foreign Slippers
4) Elephants by Rachael Yamagata
5) Duet by Rachael Yamagata

The really sad and distressing thing is that after the top five my taste appears to begin to rock out. I guess I didn't realize I was this much of a mushy girl.

Will Alicia Keys and Jack White make it in to the top five? Will Lorretta Lynn or Alison Krauss make an appearance? And what about that song Radio by Beyonce that the ipod keeps playing seemingly every fourth song?

Stay tuned for next weeks exciting adventure!

Thursday, January 29, 2009

The Wine that I am Drinking

For those of you who think all I do when I come home is sit on the couch with one hand in my pants and another around a big glass of deep, meaty, dry, red wine.

Well poo on you. Sometimes I drink white wine.

A few weeks ago I told you about the Pinot Noir I had from Cloudline. Yesterday when I was at the wine shop I saw this beauty, the Cloudline Pinot Gris (2006), sitting in the cold case next to the champagne. I wasn't going to buy it, it was $20 and out of my price range. "Never mind, some other day maybe," I said thinking that maybe with payday coming I would splurge then.

"It's our last one, and we're not carrying it anymore."


It is delicious! It's the color of corn silk and tastes of musky flowers. Not dry, but not sweet either. It makes your Chardonnay look like a primitive fish with legs. I had it tonight with some red curry and a Manhattan maki.

I also wanted to give you a heads up on a new feature that Wingal has berated me in to doing. We had a good laugh at how lame the top 5 songs in the "Top 25 Most Played" play list on my iTunes were (read: Wingal called me a loser for 15 minutes while struggling to breath as she fell off her futon laughing at the songs). So tomorrow when I get home, I'll sync my ipod and give you the list of the top five songs that prove just how lame I am. Please feel free to list your top 5 most oft listened to songs as well. Hopefully your lists will give me some new songs to listen too and I'll finally be cool.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Our Second President

I thought it was just me and Chef. I thought we were the only big old geeks to love, and I mean LOVE, the HBO mini-series John Adams. But then award season came and Paul Giamatti and Laura Linny and others from the cast have been reaping the benefits. Really, please, see this. Rent it buy it steal it I don't care, JUST SEE IT. Do you need to borrow my copy of the DVDs? I'll ship it to you.

We bought and watched the series on DVD last summer. Hope was not the democratic nominee and merely a glimmer in our eyes and hearts. We plugged in John Adams and found ourselves yelling "THAT IS HOW YOU PRESIDENT!" at the TV.

Tom Wilkinson, playing the 18th century's answer to Bill Clinton, (both incredible statesmen, both shrewd politicians, both have a thing for the chubby girls) has received a few (well deserved) awards as well. And really, this will make you appreciate dirty old men even more than you did before.

And when Alexander Hamilton looks like this:

I mean, how can you really argue with me? Seriously, go watch this now. I'll wait here for your thanks and praise.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Continuing saga of Mooch & his wenis.

There is an Inuit tribe up near the Arctic Circle where the span of time that covers from approximately January 15th – February 20th is loosely translated as “the-month-that-is-so-cold-that-when-dogs-pee-they-pee-on-themselves.”

If only that were the case at casa de Mooch.

Mooch, as you will recall, had some wenis complications in 2007 that resulted in his chariot swinging low and Chef donning rubber gloves about 6 times a day to lube the old man. Mooch has since healed, his wenis stays well hidden in his furry undies and the gloves have since collected dust. But still on every walk, due to the pain our wallets continue to feel from the surgery, Chef and I make sure that Mooch takes a pee and the plumbing is still operative.

As I am sure the weather-man, or possibly the national news, has told you we here in the Midwest have fallen in to the 9th circle of Hell and are living along the banks of the Cocytus. The high today, the HIGH, was -5 degrees. With the wind from Lucifer’s wings, the wind-chill brought us down to -20 in some areas of the city. Mooch has let us know, in no uncertain terms, that this is an unacceptable temperature.

As Chef is home during the day, he gets the honor & the glory of walking the boys in the morning and early afternoon. With the recent cold, the walks have been very short to nonexistent as all three of them are insisting on peeing, “studying physics,” and running home; we haven’t made it off the block, let alone our side of the street, in over a week. Today it was so cold, one little puggy did his duty and ran inside. The next little puggy didn’t do anything outside, ran in and hit the pee-pad. Mooch, the third little puggy, didn’t do anything outside, nor inside. He came in from his walk and laid down. Chef wouldn’t have worried but the voice from the Care Credit card sang to him “Mooooochie has to pee! His wenis may be broken! Check his pipe snake!” Between the hours of 9am and 3pm, Chef took Poor Mooch out in to the cold seven times. And not once did he pee.

One time they went out, Mooch ran steaming down the sidewalk and jumped into a huge snowdrift and “studied physics.” He jumped out and ran for home. No pee. The next time, he showed some interest in spot where another dog had peed.

“Hey Guy, someone peed over there!” exclaimed Mooch as he dove in a snow bank.

Chef/Guy shook his head as he watched the old pug leap through the snow. Suddenly realizing that he was a) cold and b) up to his jowls in snow, Mooch looked up and Chef as if to say “Holy fuck! Guy, it is freezing! What the hell?! Get me out of here!” And they went home. And not once did he pee.

It was now 3pm and Mooch had not peed since 11pm the night before. That is 16 hours with out a whiz. For any dog (or person for that matter) this is not healthy, especially not for one that has had extensive surgery on the area. I consulted the good people over at, but to no avail (really, the best anyone there could give me was “offer him a treat!”). Chef decided to call the vet and see what he should do…
“So he hasn’t peed in 16 hours you say?” asked the vet.

“Yeah,” said Chef, “I’m really getting worried.”

“It is a concern, the bacteria found in urine is not good when trapped in a warm bladder for so long, especially one that has had issues before,” said the vet confirming Chef’s fear.

“Okay, what can I do?”

The vet then went on to explain to Chef that he needed to get on the floor with Mooch and gently squeeze and apply pressure to Mooch’s bladder and wenis. Chef sighed a heavy sigh as he realized that this was once again his heft to bear.

Gallantly, Chef descended to the floor and firmly (but gently) applied pressure to Mooch’s bladder, and then his wenis.


Feeling that he was going to need a strong drink before getting back to servicing Mooch, Chef prepared a spot (two spots he insists) of tea. As the water began to boil, Chef noticed that Mooch had begun the dance of pee on the pee-pad near the kitchen door. Spinning like a whirling dervish looking for God, Mooch twirled the pee-pad in to a ball and then walked away. He walked over to one of the dog beds and lifted his leg. Fearing having to go outside to get to the laundry room should the bed become soaked with urine, in an amazing feat of strength and quick thinking Chef launched him self out of the kitchen, grabbed the ball of pee-pa, flung the dog bed out of the line of fire, and got the pad under Mooch just in the nick of time. Mooch snorted a sigh of relief as he emptied a lake on to the pee-pad and floor.

“Treats all around,” yelled Chef and the pee-party began! There was much dancing and rejoicing. And mopping. Much mopping. And then Mooch, so happy to have finally gone pee, curled up in the bed and fell asleep.

We took him out at 6pm for the evening walk. He didn’t pee.

He just looked at Chef and winked.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Saturday, January 03, 2009

Thursday, January 01, 2009

Happy New Year!

I know you are all waiting with bated breath wondering what it is that Boobarella & Chef did for New Year's Eve. Well, wait no longer! Chef spent two days making his highly praised and always delicious cassoulet. We brought it, along with some wonderful homemade pumpernickel over to our friends Jenn & Mark's home for a night of good food and good fun with good friends.

We enjoyed dinner with a couple of bottles of wine from the N.H.L. Signature Wine Series. A bottle of Bobby Hull Chardonnay and Tony Esposito Cabernet to be exact. The Cabernet was meaty and a nice accompaniment to the cassoulet and the Chardonnay tasted not like the inside of Gordy Howe's socks, but had a good buttery flavor with a citrus aftertaste.

I had asked Jenn for the bottles so I could take a picture of the labels (they were signed) and read what was on the back of the bottle. But this morning when I woke from my drunken haze I found something else all together in my bag. . .

While my brother suspects the mischievous specter of our grandmother was at work, none of my pictures are tilted in her usual manor and all of my salad dressing is still well within the range of edible. So that leaves one of three possibilities: 1) Jenn has no idea what to do with acorn squash and has decided to let Chef give it a try, 2) these were Chef's prizes for winning the card game (that Jenn & I totally had in the bag until Chef & Mark cheated somehow that I believe involved grape vodka - and they laughed at me for taking my cards with me to the loo) or 3) the bottles were in my bag, but they turned in to gourds when the clock struck midnight.